I feel as though I’ve really met A LOT of men these past few months — some of them are great guys, many of them an intellectual match…but, so far, I haven’t met anyone I want to make home-made pornos with. Not that I would make home-made pornos, mind you, but I haven’t felt that sort of connection or desire to get naked with any of these guys I’ve met…yet. I’m willing to be patient, to give things time to develop…but I’m kinda doubtful that I’m gonna get to where I’m feelin’ it with anyone I’ve met thus far. There’s just no chemistry. (Which might explain my contemplating looking for a lover.)
A few weeks ago, my ex boyfriend recommended I read “Why You’re Not Married Yet,” by Tracy McMillan, especially the chapters entitled something like, “Because You’re a Dude” and “Because You’re Godless.” I agree with one of these, by the way. In fact, I wrote about it many months ago, acknowledging that it’s difficult for me to step outside of the in-charge role I have both in the workplace and at home. I was momentarily put off by his recommendation, but perused those chapters while in a local bookstore — I found it a good reminder and, unlike the language might suggest, not at all grating.
While nearly everyone agreed that the guy who wrote that arrogant message the other day was a total douche, I ran across another over the weekend: He noted that he like the opening in my profile and said that he didn’t think we take enough time to be playful and childlike and laugh. Promising, right? So I wrote back that I liked the closing comments in his profile and that, were we ever to get together, we would surely find much to laugh about. He challenged me to be spontaneous and meet him yet that night, leaving his digits. I had other commitments (like seeing a friend who lives in an exotic foreign country who I’m likely to see just once a year). I texted him later, during a lull in the energy, but didn’t hear back until morning, when he wrote something along the lines of making decisions based on others’ decisions. Which — translated — meant that, since I didn’t drop everything to make plans with him the night before, he wasn’t interested (thereby confirming I’d made the right decision). The friends and colleagues who’ve heard about that one agreed that he’s an even bigger douche than the narcissist.
Remember more-like-it? Well, I was taking a walk with my date the other day and, where the walking path meets the bike path, ran in to him on his bicycle. Yep, still somethin’ pretty cute about that guy!