my weekend: a test of stamina

How long ago was it that I wrote I was beginning to feel fatigued by this whole serial dating thing? Right, only a few days ago.

So why then, would I schedule a date Friday immediately after work, followed by a haircut, birthday party and no fewer than three dates on Saturday? Gahhhh!

I suppose it’s because I want to know, because I suspect I may have some answers after this weekend — at least for those who are repeats…

But what am I looking for? I’m not sure I can answer that now. I think about sex and there are two fellows that come to mind:  my last boyfriend (who would spazz if I booty called him this many months later) and one other, who I am not currently dating and never really have. I’ve said before that none of the new guys I’ve met have inspired any desires to run home and make pornos with them. I’ve certainly captured some men’s interest in this vein…there’s just something that’s not a vibe match for me.

And then I think about the long haul, and I don’t think I want to find that man right this minute, either. I’m just not sure I’m ready.

So what’s my happy medium? Finding someone I like, and to whom I’m wildly attracted, who’s great a conversation and fun, to date and share physically, who is willing (and capable) of monogamy. If he had longer-term potential, I’d be okay with that, too, I think…I just don’t want to know it right away.

About failedatforty


4 responses to “my weekend: a test of stamina

  • A Dog With Fleas

    Wanted to let you know I nominated you for the “Seven Things” award.

  • Jennifer

    I have been reading your blog for a little while and am in the exact same boat. I began internet dating March this year and have had many 1-date occasions where they weren’t interested or I wasn’t. It wasn’t until I did sleep with one on the first date (surprised myself!). I was all excited, he wanted something like … every two months (work and children commitments) and he quizzed me and really made me think about what I did want. After more dates with others (and the occasional meeting with that guy) I figured out what it was. Similar to yourself. I just want to meet the one guy on the weekends, spend some time, have some sex, implement monogamy but still keep my space during the week. I don’t want long term … just a happy medium. Now wouldn’t you think there would be plenty of guys who would jump at that chance? Not many it seems. They all want long-term or quick sex and move onto the next. It’s tricky out there! Good luck! :)

    Jennifer
    Sydney, Australia

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